JANUARY CAN BE the darkest and most depressing month of the year.
January is when your Christmas bills come in — the stress of which can make you break 7 out of your 10 New Year’s resolutions in the first week.
January is so dark and dismal it can make people want to escape the rain and clouds with a tropical vacation in the sun.
This is a mistake.
Because when you come back from the fun in the sun, it will still be January — and the North Olympic Peninsula will seem even darker and more depressing than when you left.
To a steelhead fisherman, January is the best time of year.
Steelies often fill the rivers.
The Quileute knew January as “the month the steelhead spawned.”
But the weather can be a little rough for fishing in January.
Winter steelhead fishing is a demanding sport, but there are a lot of ways you can prepare for it.
The proper diet is important.
It takes endurance and stamina to stand by a plunking fire and lie like a rug all day.
Or ride the anchor in a leaky boat under a pounding rain, trying to get the barbecue lit.
The first thing you need to remember about a steelheader’s diet is to super-size everything.
I know one of your New Year’s resolutions was to lose weight, but according to the latest statistics, you probably already blew that one by now anyway.
Take it from me: Those few extra pounds you put on now will be worth it later.
That extra layer of blubber could give you the edge you’ll need for a day on the river.
Other steelhead fishermen have learned to cope with the freezing weather by growing hair.
So if your resolution in January 2009 was to not get a haircut for a year, you’re good to go.
Once you grow enough fur and blubber, maybe you can still fit into today’s technologically advanced foul-weather gear.
A good rule of thumb is to wear clothing in layers.
Put one layer over another until you cannot move.
Now wrap yourself in thick black plastic and duct tape.
It might be a good idea to test your cold-weather gear before you head out on the river.
Try sitting in a cold shower with a fan going in the dark, listening to banjo music.
Can you make it eight hours with one chaw of ’backy?
You may have what it takes to be a steelhead fishermen.
Highway 101 is another fishermen’s friend.
On the West End it’s a treacherous, frozen, snake of a road in winter.
Sometimes it’s closed by landslides, snow-slides and fallen trees tangled up in the power lines.
Perfect. It keeps the tourists from ruining the fishing.
You can float one of our rivers without fear of getting rammed.
I like to fish for steelhead on a gloomy January day when it doesn’t get fully daylight until about 10 in the morning.
The river reflects the gray color of the sky.
Along a shore of gray rocks, the gray trunks of giant trees are wreathed in the gray vapors of winter.
In this gray world of twilight, a ghostly fish waits to erupt from the surface of the gray water like a streak of gray lightning.
At times like that, you don’t notice the cold.
It’s a climactic theory of relativity.
Go south for the winter and your return home will seem dark and dreary.
Go west for a day of rain and wind on the river, and your return home, however humble, will be warm and cozy as can be.
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Pat Neal is a North Olympic Peninsula fishing guide and humorist. His column appears every Wednesday.
Pat can be reached at 360-683-9867 or patnealwildlife@yahoo.com. The “Pat Neal WildLife Show” is on radio KSQM 91.5 FM (www.scbradio.com) at 9 a.m. Saturdays, repeated at 6 p.m. Tuesdays.
Pat can be reached at 360-683-9867 or patnealwildlife@yahoo.com or go to .
The Pat Neal Wildlife Show is on radio KSQM 91.5 FM (www.scbradio.com) at 9 a.m. Saturdays, repeated at 6 p.m. Tuesdays.
