Kinetic Skulpture Race an ekcentrik pageant of imagination, merriment

PORT TOWNSEND — Port Townsend’s 36th Kinetic Skulpture Race will showcase kontraptions powered only by humans that can survive kwicksand and mud, float in the bay and transverse hills during a tongue-in-cheek celebration of the ridikulous this weekend.

“Some skulptures are engineering marvels while most are a mixture of bicycle parts, styrofoam, duct tape, imagination and prayers,” according to the website at www.ptkineticrace.org.

Every racer will get an award — whether they want it or not — but the most coveted is the “Mediocrity Award,” earned by the skulpture that finishes the race in the exact middle of the pack.

The theme this year is mediocre superheroes, with directions to participants to “create your own.”

After a get-together this evening, Saturday’s festivities will start at Low Noon with a parade, followed by safety tests and the water event of the two-day race.

At Saturday evening’s Koronation Ball, a new Rose Hips Kween will be chosen from contestants displaying talent, jokes and recipes.

Uncle Frank and the Dope 6 will perform and attendees are urged to dress as their favorite mediocre super heroes.

Admission is $15 at the door at the American Legion Hall, 209 Monroe St. The dance is for those 21 and older.

The race will continue Sunday — after racers sing to the krowd and prove they are sober despite making merry the night before.

“Kinetic Kops will issue citations, kontrolling khaos and konfusion at the event, while the glorious judges look on to find their favorites,” the website says, adding that bribes can be given freely.

Entry fees for racers are $20.18 for the first pilot and $20.18 per each additional pilot.

Here is the weekend’s line-up:

Tonight

• 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. — Early K-Bird Hospitality Party, The Old Whiskey Mill, 1038 Water St. Entry is free. Food and drink may be purchased from the restaurant.

Saturday

• 10:30 a.m. to noon — Skulpture staging and racers information meeting, US Bank parking lot, 1239 Water St.

• Noon to about 3:30 p.m. — Kinetic Parade from the US Bank to the end of Water Street, skulpture safety tests on Monroe Street, staging for the start of the race on Water Street, followed by the first event in the race, the water kourse.

• 8 p.m. to 12:30 a.m. — Kween Koronation Kostume Ball, American Legion Hall, 209 Monroe St.

Sunday

• 10:30 a.m. to noon — Skulpture staging, team song and dance, sobriety test, on Water Street.

• Noon to about 5 p.m. — Port Townsend Road, Sand and Mud Kourse. (See website for map of race route.)

• About 6 p.m. to about 8 p.m. — Survivor’s Post Party and Awards Ceremony.

For more information, including the rules of the race, see the website at www.ptkineticrace.org.